Strugglers

I was such a loser when I was in school, 15 or so years ago. I was enrolled in a four-year program, but it ended up taking me six and a half years to complete it. I think I was literally the worst student in the entire program, for several reasons.

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First, I was just lame; I lacked discipline and just did not care. The second thing that held me back from succeeding in the program was my business. I actually did not consider it a business at the time, more like a hustle — an online store that I used to sell records.

…if you are struggling, then you attract other strugglers, and then you become a group of strugglers.

In school, whenever we had to do a group project, I would try to do as little as possible because I was focusing on my business and I just did not care. With those types of projects, the instructor will assign students into groups, splitting up the best and worst students.

Obviously, I was one of the worst students and so I attracted the other students who were struggling. We would show up late and do a bad job. It had not clicked for me yet that these types of projects were about personal development, growth, and hanging around great people. For me, it was easier to connect with the other lame people because I was lame and that is what made me feel most comfortable. I did not feel as bad about myself because the people I hung around with were in the same situation.

Here is the lesson for today, if you are struggling right now, look at the people that you associate with. You might be working pretty hard, but still just can’t get things to work out the way you want them to. This actually happens to a lot of entrepreneurs and it doesn’t mean they’re dumb or lazy. They want to improve, so they attend seminars, watch videos, etc., yet they still struggle. A lot of the time, they continue to struggle because the people they hang around are holding them back.

If you really want to advance to the next level, you need to say goodbye to the strugglers and surround yourself with winners. Be of value to these type of people, help them out when they need help, and you will grow.

I see this happening all the time – if you are struggling, then you attract other strugglers, and  then you become a group of strugglers. This is what our system tells us to do — find people that are like us so that we can talk about our problems and things like that. However, if you believe you have the potential to take yourself to the next level, then it is time to start making some tough decisions.

If you really want to advance to the next level, you need to say goodbye to the strugglers and surround yourself with winners. Be of value to these type of people, help them out when they need help, and you will grow. The winners have probably struggled before, so they may be able to offer you solutions for your issues. Winners will not give you compassion or recognition for being a struggler; they want you to move past your challenges.

This is a tough change to make for many people, but if you really want to stop struggling, you need to change your environment. If you keep the same environment, the strugglers will keep you down because they want you to be down. For them, it is uncomfortable to see you grow. What is your potential and what do you think you can achieve in your life? By surrounding yourself with others who are already successful in these areas, you will be making a huge step in the right direction.

If you enjoyed this article, please let me know by leaving a comment below or send me a Tweet @EelcoDeBoer.

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  • 19 July 2015
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